Monday, February 09, 2009

A New Kind of Smackdown


The dark cavern halls echo the tortured groan of a man under duress. The scene is morbid: an array of pods, each encasing a human: they run endlessly on circling tracks. Sinister wires flow from the machines up to a large powergrid: they are generating electricity for their evil overlords. Veritable hamsters.

Our hero is one of them. A beast of burden.

The situation is dire indeed: there seems to be no way out of this jam. The tableau is so dark and despairing that even the nefarious JimG dared not enter into this misery. It is yet another Indoor Triathlon of Tyranny!

Our hero bows his head and continues to run, searching for an escape. Finally, an idea! He'll run so quickly that it will blow the system's capacitors, freeing him from this prison. He looks upward, straightens his shoulders, and lights the jets.

With each breath, the air becomes more humid, stifling. Before long, he grunts with every step, as though trying to break the pod with sheer sonic energy. A loud "Guh!", "Guh!", "Guh!".... with each pounding foot drop.

Suddenly, a middle-aged woman knocks on his pod. She lowers large headphones from her ears, and says, annoyed, "will you please shut up?" Just as quickly, she returns to her pod, and continues trotting.

Our hero shrugs feebly, and slows down a notch, quieting his breaths.

It is going to be a long day.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Good description- I am increasing comfortable with the non-triathalete trajectory my present life is taking, however.