Golfing on PEI

BryGuy sent this my way... A reality show on the Golfing Channel, set on PEI (click here)!!!

The sport of golf on PEI is no surprise: about 15 years ago, a US magazine rated an Island course at 5 stars. Quick to look for income, there was an explosion of courses all over the Island (with some concern for the environmental impact).

However, I didn't know that there was a TV show! This will be a great boon to the tourism industry. If you watch it, you will probably be tempted to write me and ask: why would you ever leave? Before you do that, I invite you to check out the photos over on Pedaling PEI to get a more accurate assessment of the Island.

(There is no denying that the summer is perfect, though).

CC

Wired magazine gets spooky

I received the May issue of Wired today.

You can't make this stuff up. Every month they do a page called What's Inside, where they explain the chemicals in a product ranging from spray cheese to Tilex.

This month, and I kid you not, the product is WD-40.

No joke. It turns out that it is mostly mineral oil (i.e. baby oil and vaseline) with some hydrocarbons thrown in as the solvent and propellant etc. The main nasty seems to be cyclohexane which, as they point out, "will knock you out cold if you huff it".

Overall, the apartment situation is much better and I consider it resolved. Though still going to look for a new joint this weekend. It's time.

In other news, I thought I found a neat puzzle for Mom in the Wired issue. These guys make high-end jigsaw puzzles that are beautiful and backed with cherry wood. This monstrous example has a mere 44 pieces, but they fit together in many different ways: and only one is correct.

The bummer is that the thing costs $400. Holy moley! The catalog is fun to look at, though....

The Best Help-Me-Move Request in History

This is a wonderful email from my friend Andy.... all personal info removed.

--------------------------------------------------

On the morning of Saturday, April 25, at 10 in the morning, you are all cordially invited to help me move the detritus of my work life....

I shall, by the end of the work week, have moved all the operating technologickal equipments from the premises, leaving only the
BULK FURNITURE, BOOKS, and USELESS JUNK
to be
BRUTALLY MANHANDLED
and
SUBJECTED TO THE FORCES OF GRAVITATION
accordingly.

With a sufficient force of manpower, and the
ALL POWERFUL BACK PORCH WINCH
and also the
ALLEGEDLY USEFUL U-HAUL TRUCK
I'm confident we can extract said materials from the old location and deposit them in the new one within the span of two to three hours...

Thereafter, we shall adjourn to my
BACK PATIO
and feast upon
TASTY ALCOHOLIC BEVERAGES
and
CHARRED ANIMAL FLESH.

Please RSVP

And now, the WD-40 Atomizer

I won really big at poker recently, and the universe has decided that there must be balance, because things have been pretty rough since then.

Rant: enabled.

The heater at my apartment is pretty loud, which I think has been contributing to a "ringing in the ears" sensation. I have a mild case of this from, probably, my Miata and my guitar playing.

I asked the apartment complex to check it "and see if it is normal".

Later, I came home to a rather smelly apartment. My sense of smell is not keen: but even I could tell something was awry. (This wasn't just a faint odor: it seemed serious.) I shut the heater down and opened the windows. I called the complex to complain.

Four days later (with heater turned off), they send someone out. I was there with a maintenance guy (who was cool and helpful). I fired up the electric furnace again (for the first time) and there was the smell. This time, I recognized it immediately: WD-40.

Now, we all know that WD-40 is the twin brother of duct tape: an all-purpose remedy for anything squeaky or stuck. (It isn't a lubricant, from what I understand, but whatever: it works.)

I think, if used carefully, it might make sense for a heating unit.

However, using it liberally on a glorified fan probably isn't a great idea. Surprise: the air tends to fill with atomized particles of WD40ium, or whatever that stuff is made of. The maintenance guy agreed that "they went a little overboard".

Perfect. Now, I will wonder if my couch smells like WD-40 for the rest of my days. I tend to get neurotic about air quality. Though in this case, I'm not sure that it is neurosis.

I am 90% sure that I am moving out at the end of May. I can't take it anymore.

Rant: disabled.

I am grateful that I have family, friends, a career, and my health (I hope). I will repeat this today.

ps. They are replacing the electric motor and cleaning the unit. I wish they had done that in the first place. I have only been paying them rent for 8 years!

pps. Yes, the potential fire hazard was on my mind as well.

New Venture

This is more on the tech side, but I thought I might write a bit here, as I'm excited and really grateful to some key people who have listened to me on this front.

Though I remain true to my tech blog, it hasn't been doing anything new lately so I have decided to try something else: a Twitter feed that is dedicated to the spoof stuff. Specifically, it is just satirical, absurd geek headlines and nothing else.

The idea came when I realized that the best part of The Onion are the headlines. The actual articles are just follow-through filler! (Though the Kafka video is unbelievable -- a masterpiece)

Anyway, thanks again to my peeps, and wish me luck...

The Twitter feed is here. There is a blog as well but mostly as a "home base".

ps. Long-time readers will recall incendiary tirades against Twitter both on this blog and the other one. What can I say... it is a cool site, and I've been swayed. To quote one wag, Twitter is to Facebook as Google is to Yahoo.

Metallica is still hardcore

Check out this great pic of Metallica's lead singer out on the town!

The best part are the words: they match the rhythm of one of Metallica's heaviest songs (One).

Happy 10th!

Friday will be the 10th anniversary for my Uncle R and his wife C!

If you know me in person, you probably know that I had two major influences (from each side of the family): Ricky and 'R'. R is often referred to as my Beatles Uncle.

Many readers also know that, despite being happily single, I quite enjoy stories about weddings: particularly the proposal, the choice of wedding song, and other traditions such as the tactic used to get the bride and groom to kiss at the reception.

Well, Uncle R and C have a dandy story. A Hall of Famer. I hope I haven't written it before... I'm getting old and this is an old blog.

Here we go...

Both of the families have a long history with our local volunteer fire department. C's father and my father (R's brother) were in the department for many years. Many of us grew up around the 'fire hall'. We were often at the station on weekends; there was a major summertime competition between rival departments, where the firemen/women would display their skills; and, of course, our fathers would rouse themselves from bed in the dead of winter to fight a barn or a house fire. (See the quote by John Godfrey Saxe).

Ever since she was young, C wanted to ride on a fire truck at her wedding. She was often told, despite the sense of community, firemen do not -- cannot! -- use equipment for such things. For years, she was told "it's not gonna happen".

Many years later she met my uncle and the courting commenced. A couple of years later, I was living in Cincinnati and I received the call: he popped the question. I was asked to be best man.

And so on a sunny day in April 1999 there was a lovely ceremony in a small church back home. Though I nearly killed poor R by pinning a corsage into his chest, everything else went swimmingly. (Some other time, I'll write about weddings in small churches. They are wonderful.)

The couple walked down the aisle together, smiling, and received people at the back of the church. We all filed past them, going outside to blow bubbles (in lieu of throwing rice) on the happy newly-weds.

Imagine the look on C's face, as she stood at top of the church steps, when she gazed upon the Fire Engine No. 1, below. Fresh from a wash, its classic red paint glistened majestically in the mid-day sun. Four firemen from the department stood by her, dressed in their formal blues. Giddy with delight, C and R climbed aboard, off to the reception, held at the very same fire hall where we played as children.

When a father and an uncle put in years of good work, and want to surprise good people, things happen.

And dreams come true.

'Tis the Season

Happy Easter and a Joyous Passover as appropriate, dear readers!

It has been a lovely weekend here in StL. Really sunny and fairly warm, unlike the past few days. Many friends are making Easter eggs and taking the kids on hunts.

CC

ps. Factoid: my tech blog receives a lot of hits these days for "Easter". Many of them come from a Chinese search engine called baidu.com

Podcasts

Long-time readers will know that bought a new stereo for the car, Rowdy, some months back. It isn't super-fancy but it is modern: it plays MP3's, has a connection for an iPod, etc.

It has been fantastic, for several reasons:

• I rotate two RW CDs. Burning new podcasts on disc gives me the same thrill as buying a new CD. I'm not especially materialistic but that feeling is pretty neat (considering it is free) in this economy.
• I can't stand listening to the radio anymore. If I have new stuff to listen to, I'm happy to drive anywhere. Otherwise, I feel like I am wasting time.
• The connection to Canada is fantastic. I am listening to all kinds of news and entertainment stuff, mostly from the CBC. I recently listened to the woes of Newfoundland (celebrating a tumultuous 60 years in Confederation) and a tribute with the legendary Gordon Lightfoot.
• I listen to a lot of geek podcasts. Free-training during my commute!

The upshot: podcasts rock. If you don't have any in your life, there are many ways to open yourself up to them. An iPod isn't strictly necessary!

Anonymous Blog?

I'm considering an anonymous blog. I celebrate the mix of people who know about this blog but there are times when I would like to write openly, pensively about some subjects.

My fear is that I would offend someone, or that I would spend way too much time on disclaimers, trying in vain to ensure that I don't offend anyone. (In person, I like witty repartee and am fairly free-wheeling within defined boundaries, but about serious stuff, I am mortified at the thought of offending someone.)

An example topic is nationality and identity. Though it probably seems like I am always writing about that on here, the material only scratches the surface.

Naturally, I as get older, I can see my childhood in a new light, as we all do. I have had insights there as well, but I don't really want to get into all of the details.

Oh dear, I guess I need a diary blog.

I doubt if I will do it but if I do, I won't tell anyone, and I will never confirm nor deny on here. So I guess we'll never know!

CC

Prague's Franz Kafka International rated worst airport

This news piece (from the Onion) is pure genius... I wish I had written it.

Many thanks to JAK! A perfect description of Air Canada but also a wonderful play on Kafka.

Weird and Wonderful

In 2000, at a keynote address in San Jose, a mentor and I saw this man speak: Clifford Stoll.

He is, in some ways, my Platonic ideal as a speaker.

Although the clip below is not the same talk, and not as good, it has many of the same elements. He is theatrical, weird, clever, and immensely warm. I was delighted to stumble upon it tonight.

This guy is phenomenal. I only wish I could find the show from 2000. The ending part about the bell was done perfectly, with the rhythm of a great stage actor. (This one is only ok, but it will have to do.)

Bird Song

During my last summer on PEI, before I went off to grad school, I consciously tried to drink in a lot of PEI and appreciate it.

I remember walking in the woods and hearing one particular bird's song. I thought it was lovely. When I later heard it in Ontario, it really meant a lot to hear the familiar tune. Not being a ornithologist, I had no idea which kind of bird it might be.

And so the years went by... I heard the bird in Missouri as well. Now, I have a tremendous affinity for the tune, but really haven't thought much about it.

This week, I heard a podcast where a guy talks about using a sound feature on his digital camera to capture the song of birds while out watching. He played a sample song.

It was the same one.

Now, this may be pedestrian as far as bird-watching goes, but not for me: my bird is the white-throated sparrow. Click here to read about it and to hear its call. It will no doubt be familiar.

Interestingly, a mnemonic for the song is "Oh sweet, Canada, Canada, Canada". That is heart-warming given my station in life when I first took notice.

CC

ps. Other favourite birds include the barn swallow, which are rampant around my apartment. Naturally, most Canadians love the loon: we heard its call all the time on TV growing up (in nature short-films with a hauntingly familiar and surprisingly creepy flute intro), even if not actually in the wild.

Silly Pics

For those who aren't on Twitter, here are some pics of mine. These are generally from the sillier side of my tech blog.

Some acquaintances of mine are speakers at various geek conferences. This week, they are in Las Vegas and chatting about it on Twitter. So I unleashed "part 2" of a series that I took in December.

There's really no easy explanation for most of those photos but write to me and I can tell the story of some if you are truly curious.

CC

ps. Twitter is pretty neat. I am really coming around to it. Think of it as Facebook Lite: all the updates without that "another application is bugging me for contact info" aftertaste.

Baton Bob in his new habitat

St Louisans will recall the controversial figure known as Baton Bob.

For those away from StL, Baton Bob did his thing along Kingshighway, a major street in the Central West End. Generally heralded as a hero, his last years here were marred by some articles in a local paper where people debated if he was really a kind, quirky showman or an arrogant diva, of sorts. (I have no knowledge or option on the matter... He was fun to watch.)

Thanks to JAK for the heads-up !

Air Canada Transcribed

Some people like details about retail horror so that they can learn. I am not one of these people, but it might help me vent a bit:

• I purchased, online, a flight on Air Canada for late June for $660. An error code came back after submittal.
• AC agent #1 tells me that some credit card companies in the US are charging a "foreign company transaction fee" and that I need to call my card company and agree to a 2% fee.
• The Visa company says this is not true. Call back the airline and tell them "to run it through again".
• AC agent #2 tells me that AC agent #1 is wrong. What happened was that the fare was removed during my transaction. The fare is now $800. I demand that the previous transaction be voided, that I receive the original fare plus $100 off for being on the phone for 30 minutes.
• AC agent #2 tells me I am not a customer at this time. Nothing can be done. I tell agent that I have a frequent-flyer account and have bought many times before: I am indeed a customer. No dice.
• I explain to AC supervisor that AC agents are telling me contradictory things. She agrees with AC agent #1, citing Bank of America. I tell her that BoA is not my credit card company and that my Visa company does not process such a fee. I want to know if I can get the same flight by "running it through again" as instructed. Confusion.
• After several minutes, the AC supervisor offers me the same flight for $660, but cannot speak to which transaction will be used. I explain that I am frustrated that I might be charged twice and that everyone has a different story.
  
• After an hour in total, I pull the switch and tell the AC supervisor:
  

I am not mad at you personally, but I pity you for being involved in an infrastructure that is so amazingly incompetent. I hereby announce my severance from Air Canada and though I am not sure how I am going to get home this summer, I can assure you that it will not be through your airline. I will monitor the open authorization on my credit card and sincerely hope that I need not speak with you again.

A final call to the credit card company revealed that I have an open authorization on my account that cannot be removed or disputed until a charge is actually posted. Most likely, it will not be posted. If it is, I can dispute it.

That is one busy lunch hour (or 90 minutes), let me tell you.

ps. I don't think I could ever do business travel. I hate the logistics of flying more than I can describe.

Air Canada, I have reservations (about your existence)

At Christmas, I vowed not to use Air Canada for trips home in the winter.

After being on the phone for 60+ minutes with 4 different people, and with a charge of $600 on my credit card and no airline reservation, I am now jettisoning Air Canada year-round.

I don't know how I'm coming home this summer, but it is not on AC.

Details and sternly-worded post to follow.

The Saturday Night Downer

It has been a busy week. My client has me working with a small team in France which means I try to be at work for 7:30 am. Then at night, I was cramming for the tech talk on Thursday. Then, one of my beloved Java conferences this weekend. I have been in a conference centre for most of Friday and Saturday.

Today, I was really into the conference and received some kind comments on the tech talk. Some key people have vouched for me as being worthy of speaking at the conference, which has been a goal, of sorts.

I saw great presentations, laughed, made people laugh, dined with geeks, and took sticker photos. Everything was good. I quite liked my place in St Louis.

But here on Saturday night at 10 pm, I'm wondering where the heck I am and what I'm doing. This is not uncommon for Saturday nights. If one were to graph any loneliness during my tenure in the US (or even away from PEI), I'm sure Saturday night would be the most frequent.

Wow. I just wrote for 20 minutes but it became quite introspective and alarmingly "diary"-like. I'm glad I wrote it and it helped me think, but I don't think the world needs to see it.

I'll be fine tomorrow morning, and that's a problem: I'm always fine Sunday morning, because there is a new day to keep me distracted from dealing with the important things in life.

Kablammo

I have this internal threshold when it comes to public speaking and presentations: if it was "very good" (or better) then I experience a euphoria that is unbelievable. If it is anything less, I brood for days if not weeks. I wonder if I'm manic-depressive in that regard?

Tonight, we took one on the chin.

The crowd was super friendly and the style stuff went pretty well. My joke slides worked. But I lost them in example #2 and got rattled in my own head. It wasn't "very good". It wasn't "wretched" either but it doesn't matter.

It wasn't "very good".

I'll spare you the profanity and general piss and vinegar. Schisse. Weeks of study for this one. At least I learned a lot.

CC

ps. For those who have seen my endless prepartion for this, here is a photo of the audience. I didn't take it but was standing near the guy who did.

pps. I used some real-life props which went over well. Apparently this was a creative idea but for some reason that comes natural to my family.

ppps. I've since realized that I left my power supply for my new laptop at the venue, or that it was stolen. Perfect. Perfect.

Big Night Coming Up

Over Christmas, I read a technical paper on a subject I knew nothing about in an unfamiliar computer language. To be honest, I was fairly lost and rather challenged intellectually.

When I returned to StL, I signed up to give a talk on said topic: the ever-esoteric monads. (click here)

Most of my friends have suffered countless monad references and jokes lately. I have really restricted my social life so that I can prepare, much like I did when I was in school (which is unfortunate really).

I'm not afraid of public speaking but the bar is high here in terms of the people attending. Wish me luck!

CC